Mecvisuals

“You are such a slob. You just expect me to clean up after you.” “You are always working. Work is more important to you than your family.” “You are so frivolous. You just think money grows on trees.” Sound familiar? Arguments about housework, priorities and money are nothing new. In fact, for many couples, they are weekly challenges. But that is exactly why choosing the right words during an argument is so important. Even when you have the best of intentions, what you say can escalate an argument into a full-blown fight and really hurt the one you love. And one of the most common mistakes those in a relationship make with their language is the use of “you-statements.” WHAT IS A “YOU-STATEMENT?” “You-statements,” such as those listed above, are phrases that begin with the pronoun “you” and imply that the listener is responsible for something. They show no ownership of emotions, but rather, blame, accuse and assume the receiver. This type of statement is more likely to make your partner ...

“You are such a slob. You just expect me to clean up after you.” “You are always working. Work is more important to you than your family.” “You are so frivolous. You just think money grows on trees.” Sound familiar? Arguments about housework, priorities and money are nothing new. In fact, for many couples, they are weekly challenges. But that is exactly why choosing the right words during an argument is so important. Even when you have the best of intentions, what you say can escalate an argument into a full-blown fight and really hurt the one you love. And one of the most common mistakes those in a relationship make with their language is the use of “you-statements.” WHAT IS A “YOU-STATEMENT?” “You-statements,” such as those listed above, are phrases that begin with the pronoun “you” and imply that the listener is responsible for something. They show no ownership of emotions, but rather, blame, accuse and assume the receiver. This type of statement is more likely to make y...

I attended a conference this week for writers in higher education. During one of the sessions, I sat next to a woman who intrigued me because she was wearing a device on her left wrist that looked foreign to me. In my tech job at work, I thought I’d seen everything. Devices are getting so much smaller these days and they do so much that it’s like walking around with an entire computer in your pocket. But this thing she had strapped to her wrist was something that really baffled me. This device looked like jewelry, but wasn’t quite a bracelet. It had symbols on it, but didn’t light up. I wondered if it was taking her pulse or counting her steps or something. Curiosity got the better of me, so I just blurted out “What’s that thing on your wrist?” “It’s a wristwatch.” “A wristwatch? What’s that?” “A wristwatch is something you wear on your wrist to tell time.” “Tell time? You mean, it speaks to you? Like Siri?” “No, you just look at it.” “ Look at it ? But I see it’s no...

I attended a conference this week for writers in higher education. During one of the sessions, I sat next to a woman who intrigued me because she was wearing a device on her left wrist that looked foreign to me. In my tech job at work, I thought I’d seen everything. Devices are getting so much smaller these days and they do so much that it’s like walking around with an entire computer in your pocket. But this thing she had strapped to her wrist was something that really baffled me. This device looked like jewelry, but wasn’t quite a bracelet. It had symbols on it, but didn’t light up. I wondered if it was taking her pulse or counting her steps or something. Curiosity got the better of me, so I just blurted out “What’s that thing on your wrist?” “It’s a wristwatch.” “A wristwatch? What’s that?” “A wristwatch is something you wear on your wrist to tell time.” “Tell time? You mean, it speaks to you? Like Siri?” “No, you just look at it.” “ Look at it ? But I se...

Y ears ago, when I was much younger and stupider, I wrote a blog post and at the end of it I said something like, “And as a great philosopher once said: ‘With great power comes great responsibility.’” It sounded nice and authoritative. I had forgotten who had said it. Google turned up nothing. But I stuck it in there anyway. It fit the post nicely. About ten minutes later, the first comment came in: “I think the ‘great philosopher’ you’re referring to is Uncle Ben from the movie Spiderman.” As another great philosopher once said, “Doh!” “With great power comes great responsibility.” The last words of Uncle Ben before a thief who Peter Parker let get away murders him on a sidewalk full of people for absolutely no explicable reason. That great philosopher. Still, we’ve all heard the quote. It gets repeated a lot. Usually ironically and after about seven beers. It’s one of those perfect quotes that sounds really intelligent, but it’s basically just telling you what you already know, even ...

Y ears ago, when I was much younger and stupider, I wrote a blog post and at the end of it I said something like, “And as a great philosopher once said: ‘With great power comes great responsibility.’” It sounded nice and authoritative. I had forgotten who had said it. Google turned up nothing. But I stuck it in there anyway. It fit the post nicely. About ten minutes later, the first comment came in: “I think the ‘great philosopher’ you’re referring to is Uncle Ben from the movie Spiderman.” As another great philosopher once said, “Doh!” “With great power comes great responsibility.” The last words of Uncle Ben before a thief who Peter Parker let get away murders him on a sidewalk full of people for absolutely no explicable reason. That great philosopher. Still, we’ve all heard the quote. It gets repeated a lot. Usually ironically and after about seven beers. It’s one of those perfect quotes that sounds really intelligent, but it’s basically just telling you what you already kn...