If you’ve
ever experienced sexual tension between friends, you know how weird it can be.
Here’s how to handle it without ruining the friendship.
Sexual
tension is something that’s blatantly obvious between two people. You’ll feel
it right away. Not only do you notice it a lot, but other people can pick up on
the vibe, too. Having sexual tension between friends can really make it
difficult for two people to interact in groups.
That’s why
you need to know how to handle it if you’re in that situation. It isn’t always
easy. Sometimes our bodies decide what they want and refuse to listen to
reason. But it is possible to deal with sexual tension between friends and keep
the platonic relationship alive.
Why you
shouldn’t always act on sexual tension
You can
have sexual tension with someone you shouldn’t actually be with. There are tons
of reasons not to be with someone even though you have chemistry. Maybe you’re
too good of friends. Maybe you both are dating someone. And maybe it would just
never work long term.
If you’ve
made the choice that you would never get together with them, then there are
reasons for it. Therefore, you shouldn’t act on it. Many may suggest getting it
over with to relieve the tension, but that would also ruin the friendship.
How to
deal with sexual tension between friends like a platonic pro
Believe
me, I know how sexual tension feels. And sometimes you might think that you
can’t get past it without just going for it. But in order to preserve your
friendship, you have to draw the line.
If you
think that might be hard for you, we’re here to help. These are all the ways
you can handle sexual tension between friends in order to stay friends and
avoid the awkwardness associated with it.
Remind
yourself why it’s a bad idea. If you’re
not going to sleep with them, then there’s a reason. You’ve decided that for
whatever reason, it’s not worth it. Whenever you’re in a situation where you’re
feeling like the sexual tension is strong, just remind yourself why it’s bad.
Fill your
head with every single reason you decided not to do it. Think about all the bad
things that could happen if you ever became involved. So long as you remember
why you need to avoid it, it’ll be easier.
Make the
choice to never do it and stick with it. It’s all about self-control. If you
tell yourself you’re never going to do it, then stick with it. Don’t let
yourself get out of control with all the sexual tension.
Make the
decision to never get involved no matter what and then hold yourself
accountable. When you make a firm decision in your mind, it’ll be much easier
to remain platonic.
No
touching. This is a
huge rule. I know when there’s sexual tension between friends, it’s hard to
never touch. They’re your friend. They’re close to you often. It can be
tempting to swat them for something funny they said or just hug them.
But you can’t.
In order to remain platonic, you have to avoid touching them. If you have
physical contact, it’ll only make those sexual feelings much stronger. So for
your own sake, stay away from them physically.
No
flirting. This will
be the hardest thing to do. When you have sexual tension with someone, you
flirt without realizing it. However, this makes things much harder for you.
Flirting can often lead to dangerous things if you’re not careful.
When you
have sexual tension between friends, it’s crucial that you ignore their
flirtatious advances. You also have to watch out for your own flirting. Keep
all of your flirty comments to yourself and you’ll be just fine.
Don’t
spend alone time together. Alone time
is seriously dangerous when there’s sexual tension between friends. Who’s there
to stop you from making a mistake with that person? When you’re alone together,
the tension gets much worse.
Therefore,
you have to avoid being alone with them. No matter what, don’t be alone in the
same room together. You need a buffer. Have another friend with you or just
remove yourself from that situation if you want to keep the friendship intact.
Ask a
friend for help. I’m
guessing the person you have sexual tension with is someone in your friend
group. If that’s the case, confide in another friend in the group. Ask them to
help you avoid doing anything that can ruin the friendship.
It’s great
to have someone else around who can see the sexual tension between friends and
is able to stop it. They can come to your rescue and whisk you away from them
when things get a little heated. Have a friend help you and it’ll be much
easier to deal with.
Avoid
situations that make it worse. There are
probably different trigger situations that make the sexual tension almost
unbearable. You’ve probably notice a couple by now. If you know you can’t be
around them during certain times, then don’t be.
When you
avoid certain situations that make it worse, it’s much easier to deal with. You
won’t be in a place of weakness nearly as often and that’ll help you maintain
the platonic friendship.
Date
someone else. This is a
really great way to cut the sexual tension between friends. Truthfully, if you
can’t be with them, then you should just date someone else anyways. When you
have someone to remain loyal to, those feelings can even go away after a while.
So get out
there and date someone else. Better yet, bring that person with when you hang
out with your friend group. Not only will you remain loyal with your
significant other around, but the tension will be with them and not your
friend.
Never make
sexual jokes with them. The worst
thing you can do when you have sexual tension with a friend is to make sexual
jokes. You never want them thinking about you in a more sexual way than they
already do.
If you
make sex jokes, it’ll just make them think about sex with you. You’ll also be
thinking sexually about them more, too, if you do this. So avoid the sex jokes
and keep them to yourself.
Ignore it. This is really all you can do.
If you decided not to do anything with them in order to keep your friendship
intact, then you just need to ignore it. Remember why your friendship is
important and forget about the sexual tension.
It won’t
be easy at first by any means, but you can do it. Whenever you feel like the
tension is getting a little thick, just think about something else. Draw your
attention away from it and you’ll be able to ignore it much easier
Dealing
with sexual tension between friends is obviously not easy. But if you’ve made
the decision to remain platonic, these tips can help you stick with that
choice.
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